you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize