So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
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