grandma shit on top of the toilet
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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