Ambien. No doubt about it.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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