omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Randomize