Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize
