Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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