i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
