Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
