When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize