return my video game
the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Operation Purity has been aborted
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
