apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize