My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize