God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Randomize