I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
