my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
