Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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