i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
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