This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize