at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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