i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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