i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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