When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
