I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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