I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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