I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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