Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Plan B is the new Plan A
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Randomize