What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
the room spins SO much faster in panama
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
