I cannot find my penis.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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