I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Randomize
