it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
accomplished twins. life is a go
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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