were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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