you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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