how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Randomize
