ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
