It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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