so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
