Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize