Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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