Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
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