We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
