We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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