He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
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