I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize