Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Someone shattered a urinal.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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