I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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