But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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