The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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