Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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