no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
